It's quite an interesting experience to find myself inside the military culture/life and find that mostly these are just regular people living life pretty much like, well, civilians. I think I'm a little ashamed that this should be something of a surprise. I'm relieved, actually, to realize that it doesn't matter what my opinions are about the politics or morality of war in particular or in general, that it's not particularly useful or required in order to be of some use to our clients. There are no bumper stickers on the the vehicles. That turns out to feel friendly, as though it's not necessary to yell one's opinion from the back of one's vehicle in order to be present and accounted for.

I've also noticed that everyone from the Comanding General on out wears the same camoflage uniform and that they are really pretty cool looking, practical, useful, much more comfortible (looking, anyway), and I want one (without having obey orders to get it, of course).

The commanding general of this Lt. Gen. Rick Lynch (he actually invites soldiers of all ranks to call him Rick) seems to walk his talk about wanting to provide the soldiers with as much help as they need to be healthy doing their work. He actually cancelled physical training postwide for the first day of school to allow Soldiers with school-age children the oportunity to accompany their children to school. It would have been incoceivable to me from my experience that, except for maybe the plague or Christmas, maybe, they would cancel physical or any other training. Hmmm.

The Military and Family Life Consultant program, which is what I'm working with/for, was created out of an event in 2004 when the 1st Cavelry's redeployment from Iraq to the US was cancelled and their tour extended for six months. There was a recognition that the families as well as the soldiers would obviously be greatly affected (something which my experience of the military was surprising and even hopeful) adding to the already great stress of the year they just spent apart. This program was put together then and was perceived as valuable enough after the immediate need was met to be renewed and continued since that time.

It actually feels something of a relief that discussing the politics of the two wars we are engaged in are off limits for discussion with the soldiers, families, and amongst ourselves (at least at work). It is just about what is it that we can do to help these people.

Which isn't to say that that always happens amongst ourselves. Or that the nature of the military life doesn't have it's peculiar twists and turns on life. But, mostly the presenting problems are pretty much the sort which show up in any civilian counselor's office.

There's something else that I've noticed too about the nature of the military "culture" (which has sounded like an oxymoron to me until this experience) which I find myself admiring. It is a real sense and attempt to live up to the ideal that one is expected to live with integrity in one's relationships with fellow soldiers and ones family/personal relationships as well. It feels like it helps to bring a fundamental solidness to the container of military life. I've had spouses talk about how they have gone to their soldiers superiors (i.e. Sgts., C.O.'s, etc.) and those people have held the soldiers accountable, spoken as an elder, referred or brought them in to us, etc., in a way that isn't required but seen as part of their mission as leaders. This is literally supported in the soldiers "code" and sometimes it seems that it could be a useful presence in "civilian" life more than it often is. It doesn't require that anyone be part of a particulary belief system. It just defines how one is to behave within a culture, and is in this way kind of Samauri in nature. Maybe "be all you can be" has more to it than I have believed about the Army.

I've been resistent to actually allowing myself to acknowledge admiration for any aspects of the military culture. I've spent a lot of years remembering out of my own experience, which was one mainly of fear, then disalussionment, then saddness and anger. So, to find that I've come to feel this unexpected sense of approval, that I find a more human face showing now, is amusingly disconcerting. It helps that all the NCO's and Officers who used to look so old and tough now look younger, often WAY younger, and thus less scary to me. I think, actually, it helps to have grey hair. I had a soldier come up to me the other day and ask if I wasn't General Somebody or Other. Imagine that. It felt kind of, well, powerful. I don't think they'll let me re-up.

As for my work here, I generally will see three or four clients in a day, give a couple briefings, mayb do some phone contacts. We have a quota of needing to have fove direct and/ore indirect contacts in a day. My first client was actually a kind of baptism by crossfire, as it were. It was actually a couple and was on the morning of the second my second full day (they cut the new guy a break - I hardly knew where the bathroom was and I'd only been on-site a few hours). It involved addiction to crack cocaine, a terminal illness, reintigration after Iraq, infidelity, financial distress, four teenage step-children, and bad breath (well, that last isn't true but might as well have been). Welcome back to work, G, light of my life "retired" counselor. You thought a vacation maybe?.....!

In central Texas in August?! What was I thinking?